lets just get to it. try to keep up, I'll try to keep this orderly...this part of my analysis is based on things I've observed, inquired, studied, and seen or heard...and there will be a better analysis later...just bare with me please.
First I loved the reactions that I got from all the ladies when i asked this question...I'm quite sure i had the same few from all hundred plus with exception to those I could not see or hear, aka e-mail. Some were silent, puzzled, thrown off guard, and the more than often and occasional "Wow..ummmm" (haha).....I'm sorry, i know that's not funny, but I remember.
Also some were having trouble answering the question. so i asked another to help; "are you close with your father/dad?"; some said "yes", more said "kind of", but most said "not really"...just a side note
As it comes out for some of the ladies that had the answer "I don't know" they also said that they don't think that they've ever experienced love like that, or even seen an example of what love is from a man. This to me seemed to be the most tragic truth....because, if you've never had a man love you, show you what love is, what it means to be loved; If that has not been exemplified from your father to mother, grandpa to grandma...or even pastor to his wife. then how are girls, young women and women to know?...more crucial, how are boys, young men and men suppose to know...
I do believe that throughout time as we've grown to a most fatherless generation (one of physical, emotional, spiritual and mental absence; or rather overemphasized presence) that there has been an affect on life to the point that we have become ineffective in our instruction...Even as believers and followers of Christ.
Most of these ladies would say that their relationships with their fathers have shaped their view on what love is and what it means and looks like;some did not think so... with how they identify that a man loves them. either with ways that they have or have not been loved. Influenced by movies, books, friends, parent(s), self thought, or the ways that the world has defined these things....and always searching for this thing
although women say they know that men think, feel and are different than they are...they fail to recognized or identify what that looks like in many ways. Some accept a man's faults because "no body is perfect" but unfortunately they've been somehow blinded by their desire for love, longing and to not be alone and most of all ignorance (though not applied to all but a maybe)....
some men use what they have, charm, words, actions, money, respect, pride, leadership in their pursuit of a "particular one" because we actually DO love the chase. The catch is a lil different for some though. some do what is necessary to get you because it feeds the pride of a man toward another accomplishment. especially one that give the kind of return that comes with a woman...(don't let me lose you) I'm talking about comforts that are emotional, mental, physical and nurturing...some are looking for moms and not for wives....
why? because just as much a women cant identify authentic love, men don't know it either and therefore are not only deceived but deceive in their ways of pursuit... but that's get into dating! and i also have some view against that idea...haha...we can get to that in later days tho....back to the survey.....
Lets examine a few things..
- Genesis 1-3.......God's design for men and women, sex and marriage
- 1 Corinthians 7......husband and wife instructions
- 1 Corinthians 13.....Attribute/characteristics of LOVE
- Ephesians 5......husband and wife relationships
- Song of Song.....marriage, bridegroom, bride, intimacy
To truly have and know the grace of God, the sacrifice of Christ and gift of the Holy Spirit.
To live in community with one another loving each other, practicing walking out our faith, iron sharpening iron, discipleship, mentoring, instruction in righteousness.
Bottom line to cut this short is that I cannot tell you what that exactly looks like. I'm looking to find out myself. But it is not what i see here at MBI, (respect to the exceptions) (dont think you are one though), for the most part, alot of us have got it wrong and need to stop, take a step back and examine ourselves... in our pursuit, in our perspective, in our beliefs, and in our faith. Just because we are Christians does not mean that we do or have been doing it better... there is more to say...more will be said...but this is the first and tip of the ice burg
We need to ask God to teach us how to love. how to be prepared. and before you guys say you do. before you ladies think they do. Know Just What That Means and Looks Like!!!!Please
The emeny is looking to distract us in any way possible. especially through our own relationships that sidtrack us from being fully used by God and especially with the intent that we came to Moody w as single persons...and ou know it...i pray you all blessed, and your relationships. but also that God breaks anything in your life that may hinder or distract you from Him, including you relationships...be mad if you want to...
I truly do have thought toward our ideas of dating relationships. for two sides, courting, preparations for marriage. we will talk more. some of us have... we need to be better...we are called to act and look but most of all BE DIFFERENT!.....hope you enjoyed the first of my surveys. let me know if you'd like to see more and about what!
Living to Be Known...That Christ May be Known Through Us....Romans 16:17-20
This is good stuff big brother. Very insightful and lets me know what we're on the same page :)
ReplyDeleteI'm totally learning the same thing bro. We need to have a good talk about some of this homie.
ReplyDelete